Thai Chi Fuck Face

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The Thai Chi Fuck Face

There’s this engineering manager at work who thinks he’s God’s gift to engineering.  His designs and products has me determine that he sucks at his job.  However, this company loves academic pedigree.  40 years ago, he graduated with a math degree and makes him qualified to design products that turn into turds.  Either way, he’s a douche bag.

There’s a new employee who happen to have his cube right outside of his office and had the misfortune to have this “Thai Chi” master pass by.  The master looked at the new employee and said nothing. Then, he proceeded to go into his office.  How creepy right?  Then, came a day where the new grasshopper decided to fluff the master and stroke his ego.  This is where we tell the stories of “Thai Chi Fuck Face”!

I have no problem with the martial arts. However, Thai Chi isn’t really on the list of MMA backgrounds that you want to brag about.  Mr. Thai Chi Fuck Face is often seen in the work parking lot waving arms and humming some shit.  I just want to tell him to go inside and Thai Chi me some real engineering work.  He does it for show and we found out why.

While Thai Chi Fuck Face was on the phone and his office door wide open, the young grasshopper overheard him tell someone on the phone, “I’m worth over 2 million dollars.  I’m a shouldn’t be treated this way!”  Stop right there.   Take your Buddhist loving statues and toss them in the trash.  For real. You tell someone that you’re a big deal because you have assets that total 2 million dollars? STFU.

Then Thai Chi Fuck Face finally speaks to the new guy.  “Hello, I’m *Name removed* and I have a background in Thai Chi”.  Let me stop right there and say that one honestly gives a fuck.  Really? You’re a big deal now? “I’ve been to China and worked with the main master there (Paraphrasing)”.  Oh wait? You paid money to fly over and pay some master guy to let you tell the story that you met him? You’re a-nobody white guy who now knows the secrets of the Universe? STFU. “If you want, I could connect you to the right people at the studio.”  Oh wait, the one that you PAY to attend? You don’t honestly run a studio because that would require someone who knows what to do.  You’re probably a Grade-C Thai Chi demonstrator.

Here’s how it truly works.  Never tell someone you’re a big deal because you have money.  That just means you’re incapable of using verbal or written persuasive techniques. You suck dude.  Thai Chi is to be practice by not creeping people.  Don’t use it as a marketing tool or someone will Thai Chi chop you in half.